Sadness with a smile

We start every therapy session with a reflection: How are you really doing?
And we do that in different ways. One of them is making a small collage with four elements: a background that matches how you are doing right now, a face, eyes and a mouth.

Very consciously, she chose a happy smile and sad eyes. The eyes say how she feels inside. “But”, she says, “I can’t show that to others. They also feel sad. If I show that, we will all fall together. I have to be cheerful, joking, approach the bright side. If I don’t, no one will, and we’ll all sink into a depression…”

This shows how sensitive and stressful the situation still is, even though we are now years further.
How long can someone keep this up?
Being strong for the other, taking care of the other even if you are not doing well at all?

Within the therapy group there is some space for the inside, for the sadness.
She doesn’t have to wear the smile and take care of the others for a while.
She can be who she is.
She does have one moment to herself.