Faith and integrity in action

Recently, someone came to me for a conversation with this question:

I am confused by the request of my Christian friend. She asked me to take an English test for university admission on her behalf. I told her that it is illegal and that there could be consequences. But now I am starting to doubt again… What should I do?

Well… everyone who reads this question will probably say: “You are right, don’t do it. It is cheating, it is sin, call it whatever you want, but don’t do it. You are right for refusing.”

But if we think a little deeper… this is about her Christian friend asking her to do it. What happens to the reality of their relationship if she continues to say “no”? There is a possibility that their friendship will be damaged. And then what?

In other words, the short answer “you are right that you should not do it” is correct, but it is not enough. Because even though the answer is right, does it really help the person who is asking the question? My answer was therefore a little different.

I asked her what she saw in the following Bible verses:

Proverbs 11:1
“A false balance is an abomination to the LORD, but a just weight is His delight.”

Proverbs 10:9
“He who walks in integrity walks securely, but he who perverts his ways will be found out.”

Colossians 3:9
“Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices.”

These Bible verses were very clear to her. Her original understanding was correct: if she participated in this dishonest plan, it would not simply be a “mistake,” but sin. And that cannot be. Because then there is a problem between you and God.

And putting God aside for a moment… what does God say about authorities and how we should respond to them?

Romans 13:1–2
“Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God. Therefore whoever resists authority has opposed the ordinance of God; and they who have opposed will receive condemnation upon themselves.”

In other words, you are not only breaking a law of the government (which is not allowed), but you are also going against God’s order. And these things cannot be combined:

1 John 3:6
“No one who abides in Him sins; no one who sins has seen Him or knows Him.”

I could have stopped there. Question answered, problem solved. But I intentionally chose to go deeper into this issue. Because her friend was actually asking her to sin? Wow. Then we have another problem:

Matthew 18:6
“But whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depth of the sea.”

WOW! That is serious! So not only is manipulating an exam a sin, but encouraging your friend to sin is also a sin. Ouch…

And that suddenly became very clear to the person asking the question. And that hurt. Her friend… was trying to lead her into doing things that God does not approve of.

So what now? Because now we have two friends who need to talk about this together. They even live in the same house. What happens to their relationship? What does the Bible say we should do in such a situation?

Galatians 6:1
“Brethren, even if anyone is caught in any trespass, you who are spiritual, restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness; each one looking to yourself, so that you too will not be tempted.”

But how do you do that? How do you have these difficult conversations without coming out of the battle wounded yourself? And how do you do it with “gentleness,” so that you do not simply slam the door in someone’s face?

Ephesians 6:17
“And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”

In other words, as a Christian, you are saved and protected by God’s helmet. And when you have to enter into conversations like this, use God’s Word, the Bible. Let His Word and His gentleness speak, and do not rely only on your own words.

Have the conversation. Let God speak through His Word. He protects you in that conversation.

After that, we ended with prayer. Not only for her, but also for her friend. That God would open her eyes, give strength, and provide protection in the conversation that was still to come.